Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Updates and Things

Amg. I don't know why I even write posts to this thing. Nobody reads it. Meh.
I'm going through a kind of state of crisis within myself at the moment. Eck eck eck eck eck.
Although things have been getting better, and this has so far been one of by best school years that I've ever had in my 11 years of school, I still can't seem to set things straight for myself. I don't know what I want to do, I don't know where I'm going, and I still have no clue how to talk to people without seeming pompous, snooty, stuck-up, or callous. I literally spend my whole day scowling at people who try to talk to me if I don't know them/am not friends with. Another reason I would say that this is one of my best years is that I've met new people in a new school along with my friends from last year at my old school and that kept me from practically going insane these past 3 years.
I believe I've definitely grown as a person since I flew out of elementary school. I mean, I think I can actually have a conversation with people outside of my comfort zone now, which I could have never done before. I still feel nervous and paranoid in crowds and in large groups of people, but I'm getting there.

"If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman? If I'm alive and well will you be there, holding my hand? I'll keep you by my side with, my superhuman, mind... My Kryptonite..."
God, I love that song.
<Kryptonite, by 3 Doors Down.>

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Holy Hamtaro in a Toaster Oven

Holy Christ, its been how long?
Well, lucky you, reader. I have so much to discuss with you~

Be prepared.

So I've been back in school from Winter Break for just 2 days. Only two days and things have already started going horribly, horribly wrong.
(Since I last posted I have already gone into high school and now the school year is half over... Bejeezus time flies)
I've just been crying and moping around my room for the past three days.
First was when I found out that within the next year/two years one of my best friends will be moving to Maine....
Then finding out that that very same friend is in a huge conflict with another best friend... that started over another person...
Its pretty complicated. And my heart has been feeling like its being ripped to shreds.
So much crying. Too much crying, really. Three straight nights. Christ.

Well, one of these friends is going to be staying at my house for a few days.... starting this weekend. And it took me until just now to realize that it would be incredibly impossible for her to come over on Friday unless I wanted to pick her up at fucking midnight.
My drama class is going on an outing to see an actual official performance of Mary Poppins and we'll be staying out until about.... 11:30. Fuck. Why didn't I think about it? .__.